What It’s Like Mentally and Emotionally To Be a Star Kid
It’s not just physical differences that Star Kids notice about
themselves. It’s the different way their minds work. And they
intensely feel the emotional challenges that these differences
Consider the following letter from a Star Seed who remembers her
childhood as a Star Kid, and who has now three Star Kids of her own.
“Dear Dr. Boylan,
“I am now 62 years old, and all my life have felt that I didn’t
belong in this body. It feels so awful feeling I don’t know who I
am, and worse, don’t know how the hell to explain it to anyone.
“I always felt different, always the square peg in a round hole.
Always questioned the things other people accepted. Have an
insatiable curiosity, and can spend hours on the net, going from one
thing to another. I have been very lonely all my life because I
never fitted in.
If I was/am one of the vanguard – and that’s how I have felt the
past few years, it would make it easier to accept all the discord
I’ve had in my life. All this made me different and I never knew
why. I just wanted to be accepted. I was never accepted, and even
now don’t have many friends. I confront people and challenge them
with radical ideas. It makes them feel uncomfortable, but this has
happened all my life, and I feel that this is what I’m meant to do.
Why the hell else would I keep banging my head against a brick
“I don’t remember my childhood; it feels like I’ve really blocked it
out, but I don’t think it was so bad that I had to do this. I don’t
understand why it’s inaccessible and would really love to have it
“Apparently, you could have a conversation with me on any subject at
age 2, had a very large vocabulary and knew what the words meant.
“I attended the church school, and remember distinctly when I was
around 9 years old that it didn’t make any sense the stuff I heard
in church. Have never been a believer in traditional religions. More
drawn to the philosophy of Buddhism.
“If other adults come to you with similar questions, I would love to
know there is a reason for all this!
“Also, I have three sons, my youngest being a lot like me when he
was younger. Had a very high IQ and a misfit, always questioned
things! Now he’s 26 and trying very hard to be conventional. Not
doing all the crazy things he did when he was young. He was
extremely difficult to rear. Always going against the convention.
Had an incredible imagination, invented things in his mind all the
time. Always looking for ways to do things differently. Was very
sensitive, hated school, always wanted to escape to find other
things to do, very bored at school, very inventive. Wonderful with
horses, extremely talented rider, can fix anything but was never
taught. Was labeled very hyperactive as it was called when he was a
two-year-old. I don’t know if this means anything, but he was a
Caesarian birth. His speech was very advanced early with a large
“My middle son has a problem with drugs. I think it’s his way of
coping. He’s now 31. Ultra-sensitive, gentle and caring.
“My eldest son is Mr. Square, but had his own language until he was
3, when he started talking English! Had difficulty in school, was
bored in the extreme.
“Does this run in families?
“If you can supply any answers, that I’m not weird, that there are
others out there like me, I would be so grateful!”
The letter from “B” is a very common listing of the different mental
characteristics of Star Kids, and how these differences affect them
individually and socially. Let’s look at these one by one.
First, there is the matter of “feeling I don’t know who I am,”
“always feel[ing] different,” “always the square peg in the round
hole,” and “always question[ing] the things other people accepted.”
So many Star Kids young and older grapple with being aware that they
are different. They think differently than many of the other
children do. Their way of seeing things, of analyzing things, of
sizing things up is different.
When other, “normal” children in
class are listening to what the teacher says and passively reading
the textbooks, the Star Kid is noticing the contradictions and
inconsistencies in what is being presented, and raising her hand,
and asking the teacher to explain the contradictions. Needless to
say, this behavior does not make the Star Kid the most popular child
with many teachers, who just want to get through with the material
and move on. Particularly if the Star Kid exposes a glaring
illogicality that the teacher is not prepared to address.
Nor does such independent thinking make the Star Kid popular with
many of the other children. Perhaps the least unpleasant outcome
would be that such a child gets labeled “The Brain”. But some
children resent the kid who doesn’t go along smoothly with the class
lesson. They begin to view him as a “troublemaker”, a “show-off”, a
Coupled with the high intelligence and focused studiousness
of many Star Kids and their voracious consumption of books and other
information, their tendency to arrive at independent conclusions, to
tear apart conventional thinking, to use different ways to
problem-solve than the one shown in class, and to “matrix” answers
by bringing in convergent information from several different subject
areas, reveals that the Star Kids are different.
“B” talks about her oldest son as,
“Always going against the
convention. Had an incredible imagination, invented things in his
mind all the time. Always looking for ways to do things differently.
Was very sensitive, hated school, always wanted to escape to find
other things to do, very bored at school, very inventive. Wonderful
with horses, extremely talented rider, can fix anything but was
never taught [how].”
One of the hallmarks of a Star Kid is great imagination abilities.
The ability to see things that are not in front of you, the ability
to see things as they might be, the ability to see into the future
and how things likely will unfold. This flexible viewing system
tends to militate against just blindly doing the same old thing. How
boring. Let’s see if there is some different way to do
Such a gifted imagination also allows for inventiveness: to look at
a problem and envision how it could be solved. And such
inventiveness is part of the reason Star Kids often get into
difficulty in conventional schools.
The difficulties the oldest boy had in school are very familiar
themes I hear from so many Star Kids and parents: chronic boredom
with school, hating school (but not learning), the ability to do
complex tasks without being shown how. Such a conflict is almost
inevitable when an advanced Star Kid is placed in a school system
designed for the average (not the bright) “normal” human child. And
some Star Kids get bored even in the “gifted school programs”
designed for superior “normal” humans.
Current ordinary schools certainly are not designed for the Star
Kid, whose way of learning is more “matrix”, and not so linear. Star
Kids acquire (input) information matrix-style; they process
information matrix-style; and they express/share/output information
“Matrix” here means handling experience, life, data, and information
in ways which are non-linear, multi-modal, cross-disciplinary,
parallel-processing on two, three or more tracks. Let me give some
Samantha, a seventh-grade student, has an assignment to write a
short report about the witches in old England. Samantha may get calm
and meditative and then use her intuition to get a “feel” for what
it was like to be a witch in medieval England. She may then
remote-view an English village that was known for its persecution of
She might then go to the library and get a book on witches,
or go to the Internet, or consult an encyclopedia. And she might
look in the Yellow Pages and call up a modern witch and ask her what
she thinks. Samantha might then put all these inputs into her mental
“cauldron”, so to speak, and stir vigorously, and see what comes up
for her report. What Samantha is doing is a tame example of
matrix-style information input acquiring.
Let’s follow Samantha into the information-processing part of how
she handles information. She is now assembling her report. She does
not write it like most kids: lining up some historical facts and a
quotation or two, and then writing a conclusion. No, Samantha may
well start with the report’s conclusion. And she might base that
conclusion on the “feeling” she got from the class textbook section
on witches, and combine that with what she learned from
remote-viewing that persecutory medieval English village.
Samantha might then go to the beginning of her report, and start out
with what the modern witch she talked to had to say about being a
witch, and the prejudice one has to endure even today. She might
even recast her report from being about not-so-Merry Olde England to
instead tell about the continuity of persecution of Wicca
practitioners, natural herbalists and psychics from medieval times
to the present.
Samantha might use some magickal numerology to assign numbers to her
report not in sequence (1, 2, 3, etc.), but based on how the power
which the numbers selected exert so as to weave a spell around the
report, and turn the very report into a magickal instrument..
In the body of her report Samantha might combine:
1) quotations from
historical accounts contemporary with the time of the
2) a medieval witch spell for protection
against one’s enemies, with
3) an Anglican minister’s sermon against
4) a cross-comparative account of the Salem witch
trials in America, with
5) a page or two from Samantha’s own diary
from the days when she dabbled in Wicca magick.
Samantha might then
stir all these ingredients, add a pinch of wit, a dash of sardonic
commentary, add a heartfelt poem about being the misunderstood
outsider with special powers which ordinary people fear, envy and
reject; and serve bonfire-hot to her teacher and the class in an
oral report (in crone costume).
Let’s take a different Star Kid to show how they
express/share/output information matrix-style.
Jorge, nine years old, is assigned by his Cub Scoutmaster to tell
the newer Cob Scouts about how you follow a trail in the woods.
Jorge might start by stating the basic conventional principles of
staying on the trail, picking the better-traveled path if the trail
forks in two, reading rock cairns as signposts of the direction the
trail proceeds, using a compass, etc.
But then Jorge might also talk about methods not so conventional,
like using a pendulum or dowsing rods to determine which fork in the
trail to take when the correct fork is not marked. He might also
talk about using hunches (intuition) to tell which is the right way
to go. If he got impassioned about his presentation, he might
diverge from the assigned topic to talk about how to make yourself
“invisible” if you come upon a bear, or using telepathy to tell the
bear that you mean no harm. If he momentarily forgets the
limitations of some of his audience, he might talk about the time he
was late on a hike and “shoved time together” (time compression), so
that he arrived at his destination at trail’s end on time.
In Chapter 13 we shall explore some of the elements of a proper
education for Star Kids. Suffice to say here that a Star Kids School
will not resemble the current conventional school. In fact it may
not to the untrained eye look very much like a school at all. But
more about that later.
Are Star Kids doomed to be pigeon-holed as “Geeks”? It might seem
so, except for this one fact. They are rapidly becoming the
majority. Actually, numerically, Star Kids are already the majority
in the juvenile population. But many of the Star Kids are “Latents”,
because society does not recognize and provide ready identification
for them, or because they have not yet woken up to their full
potential, or because they are cowering “in the closet”, trying
desperately to pretend to be “normal”, to fit in unobtrusively, and
be socially accepted.
So, therefore, at this moment the
out-in-the-open Star Kids are still a minority, and subject to being
ostracized and labeled “Geeks”. But the Star Kid Tidal Wave just
keeps on mounting. And more and more, awareness is starting to
spread through the larger community that these special kids exist in
sizeable numbers, and are to be prized for their ways and their
future contributions to society.
Today’s Star Kids are a major Transitional Generation. This is the
Generation that will participate in the shift of society from a
predominantly old-Normal majority to a predominantly Star Kid
majority, as more and more Star Kids come in, and as more and more
Star Kid “Latents” already here “wake up”.
“B” describes her oldest Star Kid as having,
“a very high IQ and a
misfit, always questioned things! Now he’s 26 and trying very hard
to be conventional. Not doing all the crazy things he did when he
The development of a clear and positive identity is one of the
crucial tasks of childhood and adolescence. A major expert in this
area, Dr. Erik Erikson, described the process of forming an identity
“the confidence that one’s ability to
maintain inner sameness and continuity ... is matched by the
sameness and continuity of one’s meaning for others....”
goes on to note,
“Thus, self esteem ... grows to be a conviction
that one is ... developing a defined personality within a social
reality which one understands”
B’s oldest Star Kid son evidently has long struggled with the
challenge of being perceived as different, of not fitting in. As
this lad tried to shape his identity, he had the problem of deciding
whether to be true to all of who he is (and wearing the identity of
being a Star Kid with advanced abilities), or putting social
acceptance ahead of personal integrity (and wearing the identity of
a Normal Human.) This young man chose the latter.
Yet, as a
developmental psychologist, I can tell you that the time will come,
be it the early mid-Thirties personal reassessment, or the later
late-Forties/early Fifties famed Midlife Crisis, when this young man
will be confronted again by the tension and falsity of his
provisional “solution” to the tug-of-war between personal identity
and social acceptance. If he again shirks his true identity at that
time, he is most likely to proceed into his senior years a man
haunted with underlying currents of regret.
It will be fabulous when we arrive at the day when Star Kids can
feel free to operate “out of the closet” freely and relaxed,
acting naturally in their special powers, and not having to worry
about public ridicule and social ostracization.
“B”describes her middle boy as having “a problem with drugs. I think
it’s his way of coping. He’s now 31. Ultra-sensitive, gentle and
There is a good chance that the mother is correct. That the middle
son is having painful difficulty finding himself in the world, since
the current society is a “Fourth World” model, and Star Kids are
built to function well in a Fifth World expansive, caring, cosmic
society. And that he is using a very common Fourth World coping
mechanism, drugs (which include alcoholic drinking), in order to
cope with the disappointment that is the current Fourth World.
This is a real tragedy. The potential of this Star Kid is masked,
and rather smothered, under the mental haze and desensitization that
drug abusers seek in order to get relief from their problem
situation. Drugs cripple the mental sharpness and sensitive psychic
attunement that a Star Kid needs to use his advanced abilities. But
some Star Kids, faced with ostracization, ridicule,
self-misunderstand, being misunderstood by others, and feeling
alienated from society, and lonely and isolated from finding others
like themselves, (because so many Star Kids are “Latents” or in the
closet), find it all too seductive and convenient to just tune out
and drop out via street drugs.
Star Kids who find themselves in more advantageous environments
(say, in a loving family who understand and accept them in their
specialness), as well as adult Star Seeds, should look for
opportunities to reach out to these “lost” Star Kids. To let them
know they are understood, that they are accepted, that they are
valued, that they are not alone, that they have peers who want to
associate with them, and be their friends. Earth cannot afford any
lost Star Kids.
But well-meaning Star Kids also need to recognize that some fellow
Star Kids, who get into drugs, are going to need the help that only
a professional counselor can provide. It is not always possible for
a well-meaning young person to effectively reach an addicted youth.
Such Star Kids may well require a counselor who is open to
understanding the special problems, and potential, of being a Star
Such counselors are not found on every corner. The same
observation can be made about Ala-Teen and Narcotics Anonymous
chapters. There are no guarantees that a given meeting will contain
a fellow Star Kid or adult advisor hip to the Star Seed scene. The
improvised solution may have to turn out to be a combination of
“standard” treatment coupled with some side peer counseling and peer
support from strong and clean-and-sober Star Kids.
There is another sub-set of Star Kids, especially teens, caught up
in trying to find their true identity and true place in the world,
including the world of psychic realities, who find themselves drawn
towards experimenting to see if psychedelics help.
consciousness-altering drugs include:
peyote (psychedelic cactus)
psilocybin (“magic mushroom”)
lysergic diethylamide-25 tartrate
ketamine (“Special K”)
(Jimson weed/loco weed)
Morning Glory seeds
Iprocin/Iprocetyl (“4 Aces”)
ayahuasca or yaga (DMT)
[PCP is not a true psychedelic, but a
veterinary tranquilizer hallucinogen.]
These Star Kids hope to find answers
through chemical altering of their consciousness.
(Additional note to a minority of Teen Star Kids temporarily
hormone-overwhelmed: the above listing is for informational and
discussion purposes only, and is not a recommendation, nor an
endorsement of, choosing to take hallucinogens as an underage
person. Nor is it an endorsement of ingesting a hallucinogen at any
age without adequate mental, spiritual, physical, and environmental
preparations, purpose and focus; nor without a learned, wise and
experienced adult mentor committed to be there all through the
experience. And even then, realize it is a risky venture.)
Some Star Kids take psychedelics because they feel stuck in trying
to find out who they are, (given their different, multi-layered
world). And it is so very important to them to find out just exactly
who they are. And so, some Star Kids are tempted to use the
consciousness-expanding properties of certain psychedelic drugs to
try to get a chemically-assisted peek under the veil of ordinary
reality and see what is beyond – and to see whether such a vision
will help them nail down who they are. Psychedelics can provide a
peek under the veil, or outside of the Matrix. But the truism so
many of us learned on the streets of the Haight-Ashbury in San
Francisco and on Telegraph Avenue in Berkeley (CA) in the Hippy Era
of the Sixties is still as valid today as it was then. What you get
out of such voyaging does not exceed what you bring into it.
If you are messed up in your life, LSD will only make more intensely
and painfully obvious just how messed up you are.
If you don’t have a sense of your own identity, mescaline may show
you some curious images of surrounding reality, but it will not
leave you any clearer about the you in the middle of that
If you are wondering whether you are a Star Kid or not, or what
being a Star Kid really is all about, and try to use peyote or
datura or ayahuasca to find out, you may get so side-tracked by the
visions of peyote, or the body-dissociation of datura, or the vivid
hallucinations of ayahuasca, that you end up no clearer than when
you started. And maybe a whole lot more confused.
What has been said above goes as well for alcohol abuse,
glue-sniffing, and the other low-consciousness substances that some
people use to forget their uncomfortable lives and try to stop bad
feelings. You cannot find enlightenment in booze. You cannot find
out who you are inside a paper bag of fumes. You cannot really get
away from societal misunderstanding or scorn by numbing out on
If a Star Kid wants to get clearer about who she or he is, they need
to get solid information about being a Star Kid, such as found in a
Star Kids Project, Ltd workshop. They need to have a cross-learning
experience with other Star Kids ready to talk seriously. They need
to use their interior powers of “seeing”inside themselves, intuiting
their position in society, psychicly “feeling” the qualities which
distinguish them and other Star Kids they know from ordinary humans,
and telepathically communicating with Star Nation Elders, in order
to assemble the self-knowledge, the cosmic vision, the societal
wisdom, and the felt sense of proud identity, to be clear about who
they are as a Star Kid. And Star Kids need Star Seed mentors.
In Fifth-World cosmic society a-dawning on Earth., there will be
plenty of Star Seed mentors. These mentors will be set up and
available to lead Star Kids coming-of-age through a new set of
peri-adolescent Rites of Passage to help inculcate in those Star
Kids a firm grasp of their identity. And a firm foundation for
operating as a Star Kid in the world. Until that happy day, that
learning will take place at select Star Kid workshops, via accurate
Star Kid lectures, by reading real Star Kid books, and by
associating with Star Kid peers, including at Star Kid summer camps.
And even by special events, such as a pilgrimage to sacred places,
and there engaging in a Vision Quest facilitated by spiritual
ritual, and facilitated by a Star Seed mentor.
Still other Star Kids get into trouble with alcohol or other drugs,
or pathological social withdrawal, because they are confused about
the advanced powers they have that no one else around them seems to
have. Some kids hate the feeling of being different. They want to
hide, or to fake being “normal”, or ignore and deny their ESP
abilities. But the personal cost of denying who you are, of
pretending that parts of you don’t exist, is so great that the human
spirit recoils in pain and dis-spiritedness. And some try to find a
chemical antidote for such pain. But nature will out. A Star Kid
cannot forever hide from who he or she is.
Is being a Star Kid a disease?
Of course not! But the way some
people act, you would think it were so. There are Star Kids who get
sidetracked because they feel estranged from primitive, savage Earth
society, and hope that in the altered state of consciousness which
psychedelics bring, that they might find some answers. This
psychedelic strategy is roughly the equivalent to finding yourself
in a burning room and grabbing the hose to a gasoline pump instead
of the fire extinguisher hose. In other words, it may not only not
help, it may make your problems worse.
And yet other Star Kids, even young ones, find themselves on
prescription mind-altering drugs for quite different reasons:
because society thinks they’re weird, or because society thinks they
look an awful lot like a biologically-impaired regular human. In
some such cases, the Star Kid is being inappropriately diagnosed and
given inappropriate treatment. Being a Star Kid is not a disease.
Nor is it a mental disorder. Let’s be clear about a few things.
ADHD (Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) does not just come
along with being a Star Kid. Just because a Star Kid is brimming
with energy, moves impatiently from one thing to
the next thing that catches his/her interest, talks very animatedly,
and speaks shooting ideas out more rapidly than another person might
be able to easily follow, gets bored with simple things and wants to
move on to something else potentially more interesting, all this
does not necessarily mean that that Star Kid is hyperactive in the
clinical sense of the word.
Some children as small as three years
old are on Adderall, an amphetamine, or Straterra or
Ritalin or some
other medication prescribed for Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity
Disorder (ADHD). Now if a child truly has ADHD, then a medication
may be one way of helping the condition. But it is a real shame when
a healthy Star Kid gets dosed with powerful, mind-bending,
mood-altering, and energy-depleting drugs just because of someone’s
ignorance about what is normal in a Star Kid. Star Kids are sharp.
They are highly energetic.
The cruelest torture you can administer
to a Star Kid is to leave them stuck in a boring situation. And so
many things that might appeal to a “normal” human child their age
are boring to the advanced mind, maturity level and interests of a
Star Kid. It is also likely that more careful attention to their
adequate intake of essential nutrients, and curbing their exposure
to unwise chemicals, may also help the Star Kid manage his energy in
his human body.
Attention-Deficit Disorder (ADD) does not just come along with being
a Star Kid; although it may sometimes look that way to the casual
observer. Star Kids are rapid processors of most information (unless
it is extremely complicated.)
Because they process things so fast,
some teachers think that the Star Kid is not paying attention to
what is being taught. In class they confuse the Star Kid’s getting a
new concept almost instantaneously, and turning her attention to
something else, with not paying attention to the subject. If this
happens often enough, and it does, some teachers may draw the
conclusion that the child has Attention-Deficit Disorder. The
teacher may send them to the school psychologist for testing, or
send a note home to the parent suggesting that the child be seen by
her pediatrician to get help (medication).
mentally-nimble Star Kids need in most cases is understanding, not
Ritalin, Adderal or Strattera. And these Star Kids need an education
which is suited to their abilities and pace. If Federal law
guarantees disabled children an equal education by special
accommodation to their unique learning needs, then public policy
should be that highly-able children also deserve an equitable
education by special accommodation to their unique learning needs
Childhood Depression does not just come along with being a Star Kid.
Some children as young as seven are on Prozac or some other
antidepressant medication, such as Zoloft, Paxil, or Effexor. While
there are a few children with genuine endogenous (body-caused)
depression, many more Star Kids are depressed because of the
circumstances surrounding them in which they must live. In these
cases, intervention to change the toxic aspects of their
environment, and counseling for the Star Kid’s injured sense of
self, and putting some understanding social support system in that
child’s life, offer more effective strategies for improvement than
putting a pill in the kid’s mouth and sending them back to the home,
the school, the neighborhood, the peer group which is causing the
With Star Kids, what may look like clinical depression often has
more existential and personal overtones. A Star Kid who feels
forlorn, abandoned and isolated from his star family
(extraterrestrial kin from a previous incarnational existence) may
exhibit some of the same symptoms as Childhood Depression: feeling
sad or empty, diminished interest in doing daily activities, trouble
regulating sleep, listlessness, lack of energy, trouble
concentrating, and wishing to stop the miserable existence. And yet,
in some key ways, there are other, different symptoms, symptoms
which are not consistent with clinical depression.
A Star Kid will not deep down have feelings of worthlessness, but
more the opposite: feeling like they don’t know what to do with
their special gifts. The Star Kid will often not be preoccupied with
death or morbid thoughts, but rather how to escape Earth (alive and
in one piece), and how to get back to their family in the stars. The
Star Kid will not so often have diminished ability to think or
concentrate, as she will find herself dwelling inordinately on
matters relating to her home world in the stars rather than her
immediate surroundings on Earth.
Autism (and its country cousin, Asperger’s Disorder) does not just
come along with being a Star Kid. True Autism is a developmental
“Approximately 75% of children with Autistic Disorder
function at a retarded level”
(American Psychiatric Association,
Some Star Kids start off “slow” in early childhood, or at
least it looks that way, because they are getting used to being on
Earth and functioning within the limitations of a human body.
Therefore, the child may be absorbed with getting adjusted to his
physical environment; (and therefore run the risk of being labeled
“disconnected from reality”.)
And he may expect that his parents or others will “get” the
telepathic messages he sends to them, and communicate back with him
telepathically, as he was used to when he lived in a Star Visitor
culture elsewhere, in a previous incarnation. He may then decide
that the lack of telepathic response from his Earth parents means
that he had the bad luck to get a set of “autistic” parents; (and
therefore he runs the risk of being labeled “non-communicative”,
because the child decides not to bother trying to communicate with
such “communication-impaired” parents..).
The Star Kid may find his age-“peers” so far behind his
mental/psychic/spiritual development that he finds them
uninteresting to play with, or not worth conversing with; (and run
the risk of being labeled “failure to develop peer relationships”
and “lack of social imitative play”.) The Star Kid may be gifted in
abilities and talent in certain restricted areas of interest, and
ignore or pay little attention to other areas most “normal” children
take interest in; (and therefore run the risk of being labeled
“preoccupied with restricted patterns of interest that are abnormal
in intensity or focus.”)
A clinician who lacks skill in dealing with Star Kids, and who is
too hasty to impose the “order” of neat psychopathological diagnoses
on obscure clusters of behaviors, may well end up diagnosing such a
child as “autistic” or as having some other developmental disorder.
This is a tragedy, and can be the occasion of great suffering for a
Star Kid and her/his parents and family.
While there most certainly are genuine cases of children with
developmental disorders, it is important that we not get so trapped
inside the unseen, Earth-bound cultural prejudices about what
constitutes normal development and behavior in a child, that we
mislabel a Star Kid as a defective human. Different is not
When it comes to getting accepted by the dominant society, it might
really help if Jon Stewart did a comedy sketch interview with a
couple of Star Kids on his The Today Show (on the Comedy Channel.)
When people are laughing and seeing friendly fun poked at willing
Star Kids, much progress could be made in taking the fringe and
“loony” stigma off Star Kid identity and presence in our society.
Race, Socioeconomic Status, Star Kid Identity and Success
It may come as a jolt to readers of European descent but the
language which is the primary language of the most people in the
world is Mandarin Chinese. And the second most prevalent primary
language is Hindi (India). English comes in third place, being the
primary language of 341,000,000 people.
In the United States, where I live, we have a veritable melting pot
of many racial and ethnic peoples. Those who tell the Census Bureau
that they consider themselves “White” constitute 75% of the
population. Additional numbers of people identify themselves as
Hispanic/Latino (one in eight), and another one in eight identify
themselves as “Black” or African-American. 3% are self-described
Asians. One percent are Native Americans/Indians. Star Kids come in
all colors, ethnicities, cultures, and mixtures.
But in a country like America, which has struggled since its
beginning with defining citizens not of European descent as fully
human and fully equal, the cultural struggles and ambiguities of
racial identity affect the lives of Star Kids and their development.
Are Star Kids who are African-American or Mexican-American or
Asian-American or Native American any different than Star Kids of
European descent? Yes and no. Mostly no.
That which makes Star Kids distinctive, their subtle physical
differences, their acute and sharp and complex minds, their
double-handfuls of psychic/ESP abilities, and their cosmic spiritual
sensibilities, these remain constant from one ethnicity to the next.
Although it may be a disappointment to the Aryan Nation and the Ku
Klux Klan, there is no White Supremacy in the Star Kids phenomenon.
On the other hand, it would be disingenuous to pretend that “race
doesn’t matter.” By this is meant that in America, as well as in
other countries where one ethnic group has historically had the
favored position in society and another ethnic group the
less-favored status, of course “race matters”. That is to say, those
factors which come with racial prejudice have an impact on the
ethnic group(s) placed in less-favored caste(s).
factors include: being seen as less capable; being provided a poorer
education, or more readily shunted to school programs designed for
students with problems; adverse discrimination in employment; social
restriction to circles other than the “in-crowd”; the psychological
pressure of carrying an identity which the opinion-makers in your
society consider inferior; the psychological pressure of never
knowing which of your encounters with a member of the favored ethnic
group is going to be tinged with prejudice or exclusion; greater
difficulties in meeting, dating and marrying someone from the
more-favored ethnic group; and for those in the business world,
subtle barriers to customers and markets dominated by the
more-favored ethnic group.
Obviously, a Star Kid would have to be made out of granite not to
feel the influence of such discriminatory factors. And beyond hurt
feelings and psychological pressures, an “ethnic” Star Kid has dual
identity challenges. She or he is not only an ethnic minority in a
White-dominant society (like in the U.S.) , the young person is also
a Star Kid in a society which knows nothing about this Star Kid
reality, and is conditioned to brand such claim-of-identity as crazy
But, as the Tao masters have observed, in every challenge is an
opportunity. The same skills which persons of ethnic minority status
have used to emphasize their normality when amidst dominant-group
persons can help when Star Kids decide (selectively) to let others
know of their full identity. And the minority-group person’s use of
humor and selective self-deprecation to help the dominant-group
person feel not so intimidated, distant or estranged in their
presence can be borrowed by Star Kids as a coping strategy to make
their way in the larger society.
And Star Kids should not be afraid to utilize their special
abilities to help things go more smoothly. For instance, psychically
projecting relaxed friendly feelings into the mind of the
regular-human person(s) being talked to, so that the other person
relaxes and treats things as more normal. But of course using
telepathic remote-influencing in a dating situation to try to get
the regular-human boy (or girl) you like to like you is no fair,
unethical, and ultimately doomed to fail. Pressuring someone to love
you is not real love, which needs no outside pressure to exist.
What has been observed about ethnic-minority Star Kids can also
mostly apply to Star Kids who come from poor families. In every
society, “money matters.” More than it should. It is obvious that
Star Kids who grow up in poverty are going to have special
They will not have ready access to some of the resources
children from more affluent social strata have. Things like a
personal computer. Or regularly-available transportation to the
library. Or enough money to go to special events like UFO
conferences or psychic fairs, where information is available that
can help the Star Kid figure out her place in this world.
Star Kids’ abilities are not going to resolve their family’s
poverty. But it is not a dead-end trap. Intuition, and telepathic
guidance from one’s Star Visitor guide, for example, can help steer
the Star Kid to particular people and events where the child can
have growth opportunities.
And Star Kids who are born into bodies with brain damage or
underdevelopment, or who have deficient neurological wiring (as in
Cerebral Palsy, Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (Lou Gherig’s
Disease/Motor Neuron Disease, etc.), or physical challenges such as
paralysis or blindness face yet other hurdles. What? Can there be a
“retarded” Star Kid? Can a blind Star Kid still succeed? Certainly!
As many talented nurses and social workers have observed, it seems
that in a number of developmentally-delayed (DD) children, it is as
though the brain “underdevelopment” restricts the volume of
cognitive chatter that goes through so many normal persons’ minds,
and thus allows the DD child to focus less-distractedly on the
incoming psychic impressions.
Thus, such a Star Kid might well
astound family and friends with being aware of and knowing things
that the child has never been exposed to. Or he might tell the
future, even if he has to stammer a bit to express himself. And just
as the sensory deprivation of a blind person causes their hearing to
become more acute, in a Star Kid such a sight-loss might actually
create dramatic possibilities for the non-sighted person to intuit
or remote-view where the edge of the curb is. Or “see” auras more
clearly and less distractedly. Etc.
Star Kids come in all sizes, shapes, colors, personalities, social
groupings, religious backgrounds, neighborhoods and countries.
Kid is an equal-opportunity upgrade. The out-of-the-closet Star Kids
(and adult Star Seeds) are apparently a minority in Earth’s
population at the present moment.
But, given the ongoing trends of
incoming Star Kids per hundred births, and increasing numbers of
“Latent” Star Kids “walking up”, the numbers of fully-aware and
consciously-operating Star Kids (and Star Seed adults) will very
soon constitute a highly-visible majority in the human population.
As this occurs, society will undergo the most profound
transformation since Homo Sapiens Sapiens gradually supplanted the
earlier-model Homo Sapiens.
Star Kid Sensitivity
[A letter from a grown Star kid:]
“Your excerpts from your new book [Star Kids] are wonderful! It will
be a pleasure and treasure to read when it is completed.
“The one thing I was curious about is if you will include
information about the emotional sensitivity of Star Children. That
was/is one of the hardest parts for me. There were so many times I
HATED being so sensitive to the moods of others.
“Well, you know all about it. But for me, it was like watching
people through binoculars-everything they said to me was so
exaggerated and I took things too personally. If my father was upset
about work, and he spoke to me with even a slightly elevated tone in
his voice, I would cry for hours in bed that night as the tape went
over and over in my mind.
“I often wondered if that replay was a part of the "gift" as
sometimes it almost acts like a time machine in that I can return to
events as an observer.
“As I grew older, and after way too much needless emotional sorrow,
I finally learned to not take things so personally.
“Anyway, I felt prompted to share this with you in hopes that other
little sensitives can be advised on this before they cry too many
tears while alone wishing they were "home."
(-an adult woman who grew up from Star Kid to Star Seed)
One of the first things one often hears about a Star Kid is how
sensitive she or he is. We are not talking here about the
sensitivity of a pubescent going through the teenage hormonal
changes, and the emotional roller-coaster that entails being ready
to burst into tears or snap at a parent if the parent happens to
choose the wrong word in commenting on the pubescent’s appearance or
Rather, the sensitivity that so many Star Kids manifest is
based much more deeply. The reason for such hypersensitivity is due
to several things.
One factor is that many of these Star Kids are incarnating in a
human body after a previous lifetime, often many lifetimes, as a
member of one or other star civilization. It tends to be the nature
of those star civilizations, (some of whose members volunteer for an
incarnation on Earth to help humankind), that those star
civilizations are more philosophically and spiritually advanced.
Because of the higher spiritual and metaphysical development which
star citizens bring with them when they incarnate as an Earthling,
they experience life on Earth as a rude shock.
I cannot tell you the number of times that I have had Star Kids (and
Star Seed adults) tell me that they never cease being appalled at
the coarseness, the violent tendencies, the insensitivity, the
heartlessness, and the uncaringness of too many humans.
The experience is something like a college-age Freshman woman
driving home from university on her first Fall Break, and having her
car break down just as she is crossing through an impoverished,
drug-infested section of a city. She goes into the only building
open for help. It turns out to be a pool hall. She spies what looks
like the proprietor behind the bar and decides to ask him to use the
phone to summon a tow truck.
On her way from the front door towards
the owner, she is subjected to racial taunts and sexual cat-calls;
she is pawed by several men; another yanks her purse away and goes
through it looking for money. She will need all the luck in the
world to make it to the proprietor without ending up spread on the
pool table and gang-raped.
Awful as the picture I have just painted is, if you can imagine that
young student’s feelings of fear, degradation, humiliation,
violation, revulsion and alienation, you have some of the picture of
the emotional shock and adjustment that is involved in coming from a
much more advanced civilization to Earth. Even if a given Star Kid
ends up growing up in a decent family in a self-respecting
neighborhood, she or he still sees what is going on around them: on
television news, at too many schoolyards, and in other neighborhoods
I have found myself saying to Star Kids and Star Seeds on many
occasions, as they pour out their tales of unpleasantness endured,
“Coming to Earth is doing hard time.” It is a phrase I use to
capture their feeling. I have yet to have any of the star folk
Now, I am an Earthling, too, and I am sensitive to what I have just
written above. Naturally we humans like to take pride, justifiable
pride at that, in the advances we have made in our civilizations
over time. When we look at the diorama of a Neanderthal village in a
museum of natural history, we shake our heads and smile at the
primitiveness of live depicted there.
Fast-forwarding to more modern
times, and just focusing on Western civilization as an example, we
take pride in the many good features and improvements:
the rule of
law instead of impulsive actions by vigilantes
the creation of
charitable organizations to take care of children who have lost
their parents, or ones which care for abandoned pet animals
agencies which provide food, clothing and shelter for the poor
public clinics which provide basic medical care for the indigent,
and which provide psychiatric care for the deranged and suicidal,
and public organizations which provide assistance for impoverished
We tell ourselves we are a just and caring society,
peaceful unless attacked, democratic, where people of every race and
nationality have a chance to get ahead.
So, what are those Star Kids and Star Seeds whining about, someone
may ask. So what is the big deal about how hard it is to incarnate
and live among us?
Well, for one thing, there is often a gap between the ideals our
society professes to live by and the actual lived experience on the
ground. The illustration drawn above about the 18year-old girl
stranded in a crime-infested neighborhood is not far-fetched. The
story was taken out of the daily paper, and, by the way, the girl
was gang-raped and nobody in the bar, including the bar-keeper said
or did anything to try to stop it or to call for help. And it was
not a Third-World country; it was Massachusetts, USA. And it was not
in the ghetto or barrio either, but rather in a working-class
Certainly there are stranded persons who reach out to strangers for
help and receive it. And there are Good Samaritans every day
stopping to help a woman change a flat tire, or who take up a
collection for a family whose house just burned down. But there are
still too many instances of bullying, racism, stealing (by people in
business suits as well as by desperadoes), sexual harassment, child
exploitation, abuse of power, and just plain uncaring in the face of
dramatic human need.
So, yes, Star Kids remain appalled by the uncaring that goes on in
supposedly advanced human societies. (In this they are joined by the
Star Visitors, who are equally appalled.) The Kids cannot understand
how a wealthy society like the United States can stand by while
millions starve or perish from AIDS in sub-Saharan Africa.
Kids are distressed when a story appears on television of a poor man
who froze to death on a tenement doorstep, while people stepped over
him, and hurried on to their warm homes. These Kids wonder how they
can be remotely related to humans who chain an African-American man
to a car back bumper and drag him several miles to his death.
those who tied a college-age boy to a fence with barbed wire and
left him naked in a blizzard to die. The Star Kids are incensed and
afraid at the bullying that goes on in some schoolyards, where tough
children harass younger, smaller or weaker children, taunt them, or
steal their lunch money.
The Star Kids accept others of different races and nationalities,
and wonder why too many humans make such a big deal about
interracial dating. These advanced children look into a person’s
inner energetic signature and determine whether that person is of
the light. That is what matters. Whether a fellow Star Kid is male
or female is not a huge deal, and certainly not a basis for
discrimination. And skin color, well, when you have lived a few
lifetimes in the cosmos, there is little room for idealizing one
skin hue as ideal or “normal”.
The honor system is something that a Star Kid inherently
understands: and that if someone takes advantage of trust for
selfish personal advantage, they dishonor themselves, and that is
serious punishment. The cheating and the lying that pass for
“ordinary behavior” these days is painful to a Star Kid to see. And
yes, Star Kids respect proper authority, but are keenly sensitive to
the abuse of authority and position, whether it be done by a parent,
a teacher, or a cop.
Star Kids understand that social responsibility
and justice are high values, and that those who abuse the position
and the trust given them dishonor themselves. Personal honor and
integrity are commanding values in star civilizations, and are such
among the Star Kids here on Earth as well.
Another strong emotion which Star Kids experience is the strangeness
of feeling different than the norm, of being different than the rest
of humans. Just as earlier we reviewed the various challenges that
ethnic minority status or poverty or physical limitations present in
feeling different from the crowd, Star Kids have the challenge of
being secretly, or not-so-secretly, different than many of their
age-mates, relatives, fellow students and friends. Most Star Kids
I’ve met nonetheless carry themselves with dignity, energy, pluck
For the rest, who find it more difficult to cope with, the
remedies can be these:
Star Kid lecture, where the
whole Star Kid phenomenon is laid out, and Star Kids get a
chance to feel clear about themselves and “normal”
Star Kid Workshops, where
identity is confirmed, special abilities enumerated,
explained, and practiced in a supportive atmosphere; and the
Star Kid gets to meet other Star Kids and see what normal,
appealing youngsters than can be
Special counseling about
psychological and emotional problems that certain Star Kids
get stuck in, such as the challenge of reconciling their
exquisite sensitivity with a brutish and stubbornly-ignorant
parent or school setting
this book (Star Kids), which in
some ways was written to be a self-help manual for Star Kids
and their parents, among other things
Finding other Star Kids, hanging out with them, talking and
learning from each other
When I think about the situation of Star Kids in today’s society,
kept blind to public awareness of and acceptance of these realities
by the shadow government’s UFO Cover-Up and
control of media content, the song that springs into my mind and
heart is that old traditional African-American Spiritual, adopted by
the Civil Rights Movement in the 1960s, “We Shall Overcome.”
So let us reproduce those poignant words here:
“We shall overcome, we shall overcome, we shall overcome one day;
Oh, deep in my heart, I do believe, we shall overcome some day.
“We’ll walk hand in hand, we’ll walk hand in hand, we’ll walk hand
in hand some day;
Oh, deep in my heart, I do believe, we shall
overcome some day.
“We shall all be free, we shall all be free, we
shall all be free some day;
Oh, deep in my heart, I do believe, we
shall overcome some day.
“We are not afraid, we are not afraid, we
are not afraid today;
Oh, deep in my heart, I do believe, we shall
overcome some day.”
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