Evolution is an amazing thing...
It consists of a vast number of strange events that have almost zero probability of happening. It is so unbelievable that nobody would take it seriously except for the fact that EvolutionIsTrue™.
That was the foundation
Evolution was 'proved
science' because they said so, despite all the proof against it, and
they gained so much power that they were able to finally proclaim
with utmost authority that EvolutionIsTrue™ and questioning it is
Code cannot self-assemble? Surely it must have, because EvolutionIsTrue™.
Making new proteins by
chance is impossible? It must be possible because EvolutionIsTrue™.
Common ancestry is disproved by differences in embryonic stages? No
sir! EvolutionIsTrue™! Problem solved...
Atoms randomly joined to make molecules, and for a long time, the resulting chemicals were just hanging around.
But then, somehow -
nobody knows how - these chemicals, instead of naturally degrading,
accidentally assembled into something so complex that even today we
cannot make anything so sophisticated. We are just not as smart as
random processes in a magical soup.
and you will surely get something like this going on.
And this cell could replicate and thus create more cells. To do this, it needed a lot of things.
It needed DNA with at least tens of thousands of nucleotides. Nucleotides are simple chemicals that join together to form a helix. They don't normally just do that on their own, but they did in the magical soup.
So many thousands of them
randomly joined together, with no aim and for no reason, and then
there was DNA.
Randomly coding for functional proteins is something so improbable that no rational person would seriously entertain such a thought, but rational people are in short supply these days, and besides, EvolutionIsTrue™, so it happened.
If you don't know how improbable it is to randomly code for functional proteins, you can read this, but I will tell you the chances to make the right protein randomly are about one in 1077 for a chain of only 150 amino acids.
That's literally worse than a snowball's chance in Hell!
Even if all the atoms on Earth were doing nothing else than trying to make proteins, they would be very unlikely to make even one during the few billion years of Earth's existence. And many essential proteins are over 1000 amino acids long, and usually several proteins need to work together to accomplish anything.
Now that's amazing, some
might even say incredible, or unbelievable.
We have no clue how the first cell could be created, but we know it was, so it's all good.
Someone will figure out the details later. However it happened, there was now a cell with DNA with a super-sophisticated code that could make proteins and could replicate itself. And all these things came to be one step at a time.
Many such things occurring at once is so improbable that even evolutionists consider it impossible.
And these are the guys who are in the business of regularly overcoming the impossible (in their imagination, at least). So one step at a time, for hundreds of thousands of such steps, the first cell somehow formed with everything necessary to self-replicate and presumably do some other things like move around.
Considering that proteins degrade within a day or two and RNA degrades within a few minutes, this is very impressive!
How could it be? Magic?
No, just... well,
actually, yes, it's more or less magic since there's no accepted
scientific theory for this. But we know it happened because we are
here and EvolutionIsTrue™!
At some point, viruses also appeared. Nobody really knows how. Some say they appeared even before bacteria.
It will probably take a
while, but in the meantime, you may be consoled by the fact that
EvolutionIsTrue™, so this isn't really a problem.
Whenever you have to choose
between accident and intelligence,
you should always pick accident.
They were all just lying in wait, preparing to accidentally explode into dinosaurs, even though they didn't know it.
When the Cambrian Period arrived, evolution sped up about a million times, for no apparent reason. In roughly 20 million years, most animal phyla appeared, with many subgroups.
This was kind of like evolution on steroids, but we don't talk about that because evolution is supposed to be gradual and the Cambrian Period is really inconvenient.
Why are intermediate stages conspicuously missing? We don't know...
We can safely ignore it,
though, because EvolutionIsTrue™, and that's all that matters.
Evolution is random...
The Ediacaran creatures
were weird, and we don't even know whether they were animals or
lichens or algae or fungi or something else, so it's just as well
that they disappeared. Good riddance, freaks.
Future generations can
figure it out, if they want, but it's not necessary because
EvolutionIsTrue™. We already have all the answers we really need, so
scientists can take it easy.
And these genes would have to accidentally code for millions of new proteins, which, as we have seen, is completely ridiculous.
So you have a better chance picking a specific atom in our galaxy blindfolded than randomly making a 150-amino-acid chain that will fold at all, never mind be useful.
And there are proteins containing up to tens of thousands of amino acids!
The chances of randomly making those are probably about one in 1042186 or so. I'm not sure exactly because when I tried to feed my calculator numbers this ridiculous, it exploded. But it's kind of like flipping 100,000 coins and getting all heads. Good luck with that.
But millions of new genes
must have arisen randomly and must have accidentally coded for
millions of virtually impossible proteins. Can you believe that? I
certainly can't, but it must have happened, because EvolutionIsTrue™.
But you can't!
Why would you even
suggest such heresy?! EvolutionIsTrue™! We don't need no
intelligence here, okay? Just let things be, and everything will
slowly improve, smashing through entropy like a boss.
And so it went with each
1% increase until their wings were 100% complete. That's how
evolution works. No doubt about that.
Talk about luck!
The platypus accidentally evolved features of ducks, beavers and otters all mixed together.
(To be fair, that really does look like an accident.)
Giraffes randomly evolved huge hearts, some valves, constricting blood vessels and other useful things that miraculously saved them from blowing their brains out every time they tried to drink.
There was never any intelligence involved in any of it. Everything was completely random, so any creature could have evolved anything or into anything.
Check the image at the
top of the page to see what we've missed...
We don't quite know what
this consciousness really is and when it first appeared and why, but
some people insist it exists, so if it exists, it must have randomly
evolved. There's really no other way anything can happen.
This may seem rather strange, because genes are supposed to push every creature towards survival, and destroying one's own environment is rather suicidal, but there must be a good reason for this because EvolutionIsTrue™.
If the almighty natural selection selected for it, then it must be good for survival.
In a series of much less controversial events, humans have driven many other species towards extinction. This is called survival of the fittest, and humans are the fittest.
They are about to show everyone their evolutionary superiority by exterminating everything else and then starve to death (possibly after a short period of rampant cannibalism) because there will be nothing else left to do (or eat).
And perhaps that was the point of evolution all along.
Who knows? It's all
random anyway, so don't worry about it...!