by Zen Gardner
Isn't that the big question? I don't know who I am, and I'm
strangely and wonderfully at peace with it. We spend our lives
trying to nail that jello to a tree.
To what end? Maybe we
should just let it go and just be.
That's a radical thought, eh? Just be. Let's try
letting go of this identity crap born of the ego-driven
Matrix we're all too familiar with.
That's a novel concept! But not really.
It's what the true
masters in many forms have taught all along but we've been too dense
to understand. And way too afraid to try. We think there's something
to lose. Baloney...
We instead hold on,
misdirected, misinformed, mismanaged and just plain missing the
point of it all.
What are we here
And to whom?
parents we hold deep in our psyches from whom to gain that
attention and love and affirmation we never got?
Or damaged layers
And would it ever
satisfy that craving we've sublimated throughout our years
yet we've hung on to from birth?
Are we defined by
our past, our works, our personalities, our reputations?
Some serious stuff to
Even if we've "attained"
any of these misdirected aspirations, does that solve or really
satisfy anything? Another biggie to consider. Maybe job, career,
mate, sense of fulfillment or fame would do the trick? No, it won't,
Why? We don't even need
It feeds an imaginary construct. It has nothing to do with who we
truly are. It's all essentially an illusion. It's about time we woke
up out of our self serving hypnotic stupor.
It's been a long road for many of us.
We knew the answer would
be simple but realizing it is to see past our blind spots. Blind
spots by their very nature cannot be seen nor seen beyond. We need
And we eventually get it
in synchronistic and even seeming "magical" ways. If we're open and
sincerely want it.
I have no profound words of wisdom that haven't been said before. I
just like to express what I'm going through and perceiving, no more,
no less. It's not always understood nor welcomed but that's not my
problem. I just do what I do. You do what you do.
But there's no escaping
Like you, I'm tired of the struggle. It's been my undoing in many
respects due to my intensity, but it apparently had to be to get me
to where I was going. Way too simple, I know.
Like the onion, there are
many layers to peel until we get true clarity one level at a time
and approach the heart of the matter. And then we find nothing - it
was all peels, layer upon layer containing emptiness.
Or perhaps - it's more like the fractal artichoke - seeking the food
in the center when it was in each leaf all along.
But when we sincerely realize the elusive "answer" is a deep
realization of an amazing emptiness from our limited construct - oh
how full that emptiness is!
In A Nutshell
The summation to all this?
It doesn't matter who you
"are" or who I "am". It really doesn't. Just be. That's who we are.
Drop everything else. Everything...
Quit analyzing yourself to death. Once you've made the inner journey
and realize what's going on and are aware, let it all go. All...
Attachment and belief system free as the little innocent children we
truly are. Have fun with life, live your passion and excitement. Let
the rest go.
It couldn't be simpler.
What a relief, eh...?