by Zen Gardner
August 05, 2015
I received the following comment on an article on my website.
It sparked several thoughts as to what
happens when we wake up and have to deal with the ensuing
repercussions, both spiritually as well as in our personal
interaction with our immediate circumstances.
Zen, I am continually refreshed by
the content of this site, thank you for providing the
"soul-food" I need.
I have a question for you or the
group. I feel like I am trapped in my "lower level" of self. I
recognize the actions, and some of the triggers, but despite
this, I plow ahead like a stubborn bull repeating the same
How do I break the cycle? I realize
it is different for all individuals, but any direction would be
appreciated and most helpful. I have a strong inclination that I
am an agent of change, but I also know I must conquer the base
Here's something encouraging for
The fact that you are observing
yourself shows you are profoundly awake. This separation between
the programmed old self and the conscious true self happens over
a period of time as you learn to identify, and operate from, the
conscious self, which then permeates your behavior one conscious
decision at a time.
This is the struggle people go through who have this awakening,
and there are a lot of implications to it that sometimes bring
on conflicts with the conditions we've gathered around us from
our previous unconscious life.
The beauty is that they peel off as
we continue our heart felt pursuit of truth and activate
according to what we're newly learning. That's why I talk about
this so much - it's a dynamic that simply awaits activating.
We just have to be willing to pay
the price of letting go.
I know it sounds simplistic, but it really is that simple. The
repercussions are usually pretty dramatic, which shouldn't
surprise us as we've virtually found out we're operating between
conflicting worlds, basically illusion vs. reality.
Nothing we were prepared for by any
Stand strong and watch things change around you. That's what
happens. Stay the observer, and operate from that viewpoint and
perspective. You'll find your way one conscious step at a time.
Much love and keep on..
Way Back Home
It's not complicated, as life regularly teaches us by its simple
It's we who have been separated from
these fundamental, simple truths, by ourselves as well as the
ignorant and often manipulative influences of others. Now we need to
find our way back home.
This takes trusting newly aroused sensations and instincts that were
laying dormant within us.
What each of us experiences is awakening in its most fundamental
sense. Information begins to take on new dimensions with a clear
interpretation and which continues to rock our world, but rock our
world it must to get things back into a conscious perspective.
When we finally begin to taste that place of true freedom of
thought and personal autonomy it is a wondrous experience.
Disconcerting, to say the least, but
liberating and oh so exhilarating. We just know it's right. But to
look around for confirmations of our new found convictions of this
clear personal experience is a mistake - it's bound to disappoint,
save finding others like yourself with whom we can relate, which may
be few and far between at first.
That's OK, as this is part of our development. We lacked courage in
our previous existence, and this teaches us how to hold fast to and
develop the courage of our convictions, without which we'll wither
and die on the vine like so many others given this precious
Think of the butterfly coming out of its
chrysalis and how the struggle is essential to driving the
circulatory system to enable it's newly manifesting wings.
It's the perfect metaphor.
Oh the True
Friends You'll Find!
One of the most marvelous results of fighting through this
transformation, besides the personal discovery and empowerment, is
those you soon meet on the same path and wavelength!
The dearest friends of my life, I now
count dear brothers and sisters to me, soon emerged as I continued
my ecstatic journey.
I became active, communicated wildly, and searched the information
field like an awestricken new born cub in a brand new world, and
sure enough, there were many others just like myself going through
the very same experience.
Not only that, the words and teachings of the sages of the ages came
alive. I'd been a student searching for these truths all of my life
but suddenly there was newborn life in their words. Everything
It may not be this dramatic for everyone but it was for me.
After a life long search for truth and
meaning and purpose in life I'd finally found the key. I don't know
what brought it on exactly as it was a culmination of a life long
quest, but it happened.
Learning what to do with it was next.
But finding others on the same divine mission? Priceless...
The awakening is obviously a very personal experience. There's no
formula for it, just the sincere hunger for truth, real truth.
That we can share experiences and
insights as to our personal experiences in such depth at lighting
speed in a world on a collision course to who knows what is a very
special gift, and I would add essential tool we need to utilize to
That's what drives me. For me it's a personal calling. But we each
have one, and it's ours to find it and fulfill it with everything in
us. That is truly awakening.
To be shown truth is one thing; to respond to it is another.
It's all in the response. If you want my two cents, therein is the
key to the real awakening in all its glory.